Cooking was something I enjoyed a lot. The smell of soup brewing away, or the feeling of accomplishment every time I finished eating a meal I had prepared with my own hands, these were only a few of the reasons I loved it. But there was just one part I never liked, and that was cutting the meat.

That’s where Adrian comes in. I’d really like to describe how gorgeous he is, blonde, blue eyed... but I suppose you get the picture. Then again, it’s not just about his looks that I find attractive. Heavens, yes, his face was a blessing, but it was his caring heart that I loved the most. We lived together in a little apartment down at LA, and whenever meals were concerned, he wasn’t just the type of a man who would let the girl do all the work. Adrian always came home from work early (he worked as a trainee pediatrician in a clinic which close before 5pm), and as I worked in the kitchen, the sound of the door clicking shut followed by him poking his head out of the side, sniggering “Need some help, hon?” was an everyday pleasure. It didn’t matter whether I answered, because he always would. I was saying about how scared I was of cutting meat. The thought of my knife slicing into something that was once a living thing made me nauseas and I even fainted once when I thought I’d have the courage to try it.

But Adrian was sweet. He’d pry the scallops, chop the chicken, or mince the beef for me away from my eyes. “This is a job for a man,” he’d say to me sweetly, “and we don’t want those beautiful hands tainted with blood now, do we?”

We weren’t married, but he sure made me feel like it.

On one special night, he’d brought back a cold bottle of wine. “To celebrate, Katie!” he gave me a peck on the cheek, and started slicing up the salmon. I blushed for a moment, and realized I had no idea what for. “Celebrate what, Ady?” I asked, not taking my eyes away from the pasta cooking in a pot.

“You know the guy I’m under, Dr. Neil?”

I turned around and grinned, “Yeah, you’ve told me, fat and sweaty, right?” Adrian, like every other human, had a person they disliked at work. And it so happened it was his boss. But he didn’t bring the temper back to work. Instead, like a little kid walking back from school with his friend, he’d joke about them rather rudely.

He laughed, “Yeah, that one. But I don’t think he’s fat and sweaty anymore. Alright fat, yes. But we’ll be nice and take away the sweaty part.” He stopped working on the salmon, and walked slowly towards me. I was still concentrating the pasta before I realized he was breathing down my neck, and his hands around my waist. The next thing I knew, his lips had touched the back of my neck, and I was blushing more than ever.

“Dr. Neil told me in his office today," He said in between pecks on my neck, "I've been promoted." I spun around, and looked into his eyes. We didn’t need words to express the joy both of us had at that moment. Adrian was now a full time pediatrician, and that meant our income was now stable. Well maybe not OUR income, but his. I was happy for him nonetheless. It had been his dream. We kissed for what seemed to be an eternity, before he tore away. “Uh, Katie…”

“Don’t do that…it feels sad when you break a kiss like that…” I told him quietly, getting ready for another plunge into his lips.

“Yeah, sorry about that…” he muffled while we kissed, “but the pasta’s burning.”

                                                                                    ************ 

We laughed a lot that night while eating. It was either because his promotion was such a milestone in our lives, or the wine was making our heads swirl. I suppose the reason was that we were so deeply in love, everything seemed happy, even a ruined pasta dinner which tasted like coffee.

The table wasn’t cleared, and the both of us were in each other’s arms as we tried to locate the bedroom with our lips attached and eyes closed. When we’d finally found it, he unwrapped me like a piece of china, careful and gentle, as if a sudden move would break me apart. I sucked in my stomach so that my breast protruded further, hoping that he’d think, on the outside at least, I was a perfect lover. Adrian slid me down on the bed, and I placed my arms around his neck. He used his knees to slowly pry my legs apart, and the rest… I leave that to your imagination.

On that same night itself, as we lay on the bed, his arms around me, I slumbered peacefully on his shoulder. I could sense he wasn’t asleep yet. Something was on his mind. “What’s wrong, Ady?” I whispered. For a moment, the dark room was convincing that there was no one to reply me, but after a second, he did.

“I didn’t withdraw,” he said. There was a tone of regret in his voice.

Happiness and pain both swept into my heart. I was happy because he was caring enough to feel guilty about invading me like that. Sad, because I was worried he didn’t want to spend the rest of his life with me, and the thought of having a child scared him.

I wanted to tell him it was okay, but no words came out. I was so overcome with emotion that tears streaked down my eyes, and I prayed to God that he didn’t feel those little tears as it leaked onto his shoulder.

But my worries and doubts were wiped away the next second. Slowly lifting me from his shoulder, and sitting up, he looked straight into my eyes. His face was visible from the moonlight shining through the window, and there was something special about it that made me feel as if I’d fallen in love with him all over again. “Marry me, Katie. I love you.” He hugged me tightly, and stroked my hair gently, “I want you to have my babies, I want to grow old with you.” I still could not believe my ears. “At nights, I cry because I’m afraid I’d lose you. And the thought of living life without you, Katie…” he started to cry. Adrian rested his head on my shoulder, and I could feel tears leaking.

It took some effort to wipe away the tears, before I said, “Yes.”

He stopped crying. For a moment, I was not sure what his reaction would be. His head remained at my chest for a few seconds, as if taking time to fully register the words I’d just said. Adrian raised his head slowly, and smiled. Even with tears flowing down my cheeks, I smiled back. We hugged, and as I looked out the window, I realized the moon had never looked so beautiful.

                                                                                  - Luzzio, 23rd August, 2005

Alright, jiwangness aside...



The aircond's making me thirsty. Need...water....*urg*