*took the music off my blog for awhile till I find something worthy. I can't belive I actually thought ot putting Aladdin's A Whole New World. faggot song*
It's been more than 2 weeks since I've finally moved into my sister's room temporarily. I must say, it's quite a comfortable place to sleep in =)
My desktop is happily sitting on her desk. Took me about half an hour to rewire stuff from my room to hers, but it was not too hard I guess. The worst part was getting the modem wires to reach her room.
An Illusion =) That's what boredom can do to you while waiting for the others for a good game of dotA
Wires wires wires everywhere. It's gonna be a heck of an anal time moving these stuff back to my room.
Since I'm enjoying wireless modem in the house, it's only natural to not waste the use of her trusty(but laggy) laptop. I stopped resting my back against the bed and putting the laptop on my lap ever since I read the article about laptop heats causing men to shoot blanks.
One more month to enjoy till Jolene's back. =)
While Luzzio sleeps...little does he know about the evil plan his computer has.
The morning arose, and I found myself being woken up by my dad. I guess he wanted to ask if I was following him to my sister's NS visit today. I gave him my answer by going back to sleep.
Visions of manda in school laughing, followed by Boon Heng dancing and Zakwan crying flooded my mind. I'm not sure what it meant...but it was strange. The school bell rang, and someone said "pick it up".
My phone had rang at my bed side. Half dead, I picked it up.
Kaizak: herlo...?
Zakwan: Hey. Are you still sleeping?
Kaizak: ...sorta.
Zakwan: So...she called you?
Kaizak: yeah...
Zakwan: K...go back to sleep.
*click*
When I had finally woken up, the sunlight was barely shining through the windows, yet enough to shine my room dully. I sat up, and looked at my clock. 12.30. Manda has already left for the airport. I decided not to call her, and let her last moments with her family be undisturbed.
It felt void, inside. I guess the fact that I won't be seeing Amanda for a long time still had not hit me yet. I walked lazily to the computer, and turned it on. I checked if she was on MSN, which she obviously wasn't. And then I looked through the pictures. From the first month we met, all the way till less than 2 weeks ago. So much had changed, and even more remained the same.
I stepped into the shower, and that's when the thought came to me. Amanda's gone. As the cold water ran down my head, I kneeled down...and cried.
Updates will be back to my rude happy go lucky self tomorrow.
3:46am. I can't sleep. I don't know why, but I kept believing Zakwan, and expected a call from her or something.
...It's all clogging up my mind, and I break down more often then I've ever had. She's leaving, I tell myself. She's really leaving, and there's nothing you can do about it. I feel weak, as if drained of any spirit. Writing this down in my blog seemed to be the only comfort I have.
I stayed up this late, expecting a call. Friday would've been the last chance. She's attending a party tonight...
I still don't even know if she's watched the movie...or already watched it, but declined to comment.
My feelins are so mixed up, and I know I'm not the only who is sad about her leaving. Someone told me time doesnt matter. But he's wrong. I've proved that I truly do have feelings for that person. I may have my mood swings, my breakdowns, and most of my friends irritated with me...but I still stayed true to the one purpose.
I don't give a fuck about what you guys think. The feeling of being around her is great, and just knowing her as a person is ecstasy. No mere words can describe ow it feels. Both sadness and joy. Both regret and hope.
I sit and count the days. I count them every morning, as I wake up, and look at the celing. Each time, a day closer to when I'll never see her again. I dread sleeping.
I didn't have much planned today. Was woken up by Sufern to watch Charlie Chocolate Factory something. I can't get the ruddy song out of my head.
Willi wanker, willy wanker, there's no one just like he. There's so much generosity~
It wasn't a bad show. Not worth is if you've got other shows, but not bad nonetheless. I was expecting to be as silly(and dull) as The Cat In The Hat, but it wasn't. Too bad Violet turned so fat. I was hoping her clothes would be ripped off when she inflated. Hot hot.
Nothing to blog about today.
...I've nothing else to describe the situation it's been for the last 3 years, except this phrase.
"For she is the moon, And I the wolf that sighs beneath her beauty" - October
Manda dropped by school today to pass Li Ching something. It was probably the last time I'd ever see her, or hear her voice. Yet I didn't dare talk to her, or even reply her.
'Why?' i asked myself.
I guess i knew that if I talked to her today, it'd be harder to get over it.
So...I just pretended I didn't notice her...and went about as usual. Sigh. She said goodbye to me, but I didn't reply.
...the project I've been working on for 2 months was finished last night, and it's actually a DVD movie for her. I passed it to Li Ching. Hope manda watches it...
Nothing to blog about today too, so I'll just post some pics I took in school today.
Sabrina Ong. I just realized I don't know her full chinese name. Hold on, asking her now...
...she said she dont wanna give
Khe Chun. We were going through what English names would suit her. I suggested Samantha, but she said it was only meant for pretty girls, her not being one -.- girls...
And here we have a xiao Xiao Yu. Mata sepet =p
I don't think this picture does Hui Yin much justice. Anyway the fei chai next to her is Boon Heng.
Khe Chun and Colin, the Sigma King.
Xiao Yu and Wan Tan. Or is it Tan Yang? Wan Yang? Ah wtv.
The three chinese boys and girls in our class. I'm a malay, you see.
Bang!
Amazing. A picture of my crappy face in contrast with Khe Chun.
Jo Lynn shows her opinion on the goverment on Rafidah's issue. "Blek! not interested!"
Cool Nima, Crazy magical Zakwan, and Poser Saufi. We got the brownies here.
LOL. See no Nima, say no Zakwan, hear no Saufi.
Misliah! =)
Avineh, Nimalan, Hijaz, Saufi, Khe Chun and Jamie.
It belongs to Zakwan... big and bouncy.
Haih...when I smile my face turns into a PAU...T.T
Take one Home today!
Pic of the day:
Boon Heng is making Jade cry! Omg, what's going on? Gossip!
I can't believe myself. I've actually finished my peka for Addmaths and Bio.
Probably the gayest little thing you've ever seen made from a guy.
No updates today too, since I'm more busy enjoying what's left of my weekend(17 minutes). Sigh, life is short. We're so busy working hard for a good life in the future., that we never even get to enjoy it.
Pic of the day:
Sufern's Com, the Compufridge! Filled with MEGA BITES of tasty ddrham!!! Yes I know my
pun's are cheesy! Haha, get it? Cheesy! Hahahahaha -ah nvm.
p/s: Kaizak is NOT real. He's just a nickname I use for boring entries.
Luzzio has decided to create an alter ego for his blog entries, and thus I was born. He wished to realize that there is a difference between the both of us. We are the same person, one being, yet so different from one another that you would think we were not.
While Luzzio represents emotion, be it laughter, sadness, or hatred, that would be done by him, with his own style.
Yet...I am different. Was the soul purpose that I was created just to satisfy his taste for a variety of writing styles...and just to be forgotten, never again used once bored? We shall see, won't we?
Hmph. Luzzio is different from me in many ways besides petty facts like joking or mocking. I remain, unlike him, neutral, and ignorant about others. My name was adapted from the character in his novel, Luzzio's alter version from the limbo world.
No com shall be down,
Or he'll kick them out of town!
That's why the Sigmains sing,
That Colin is our King!
After a gruelling 5 hours, Ooi Hong(Colin) has finally fixed my com, the final solution being the use of double sided tape. =) for a gruelling 5 hours, I had no idea what his technical words meant, so I just nodded yes and 'uh-huh'.
Apparently this was the problem with my com overheating so much. Dust, dust, dust had gathered all over the heatsink. Kekeke.
Thanks Ooi Hong =) And thanks to him, you guys ain't getting an update tonight, cos I'm off dotAing!!!
YES! I can finally finish amanda's project without a prob!
Pic of the day:
See, fat.
ps: Seems we have a foreign flamer in our blogosphere lately. Give him a scolding if u can, k?
