I submitted this into Gemala. Wrote it about 2 months back.
The road seems so long.
The first day I met you, I was not sure if it was just me, or if someone had really injected drugs into my veins from behind. The day at the carnival seemed so short. I caught my first glimpse of you when queuing up for a ride. For that moment, the sounds of the roller coaster seemed to fade off, and everyone around me disappeared except you.
Hello there stranger? Are you lost too?
It took me more courage than I thought I had to introduce myself. You smiled shyly, not knowing who this boy standing in front of you was, or the special place he'd take in your heart forever. I remember how your friends giggled from behind, enjoying a romantic scene. But I didn't care what they thought, because at that moment, all I hoped was for you to acknowledge my existence.
Maybe if we walk together, we'll find where this road leads to.
Remember our first date at the movies? Ah…I shed a tear of joy each time I do. You held on to my shoulder tightly as we watched the horror flick, too afraid to watch the ghost appear. When you found out that I had my eyes closed all through the show, you wouldn't stop laughing all the way back as I drove you home. It was only when a little kiss was planted on your cheek in front of the door that you hushed, and your face turned bright red.
On the day we married, I was the happiest man on earth. There were probably no angels singing, or little white doves flying above the church as we walked out as man and wife. But I was happy, because seeing you smile and thinking that you were mine forever seemed too good to be true. And it was.
Braving the odds, we journeyed together hand in hand. Your shoulder was my strength, and your heart was my hope.
When we moved into our new home, you happily dragged me to every room, pointing out every detail of how you wanted it furnished. The room for the children that we would have must have its walls painted bright blue, with stars and planets drawn on it so that he or she would not be afraid of the dark during the night. The wall in our bedroom that blocked us from the rising sun to was to have a sliding glass door so that we could greet the new day together every morning. I laughed at how you thought our house could be turned into a romantic haven, and you pouted the entire day until I agreed to work on it immediately.
The road is uncertain. But as long as you are with me, my friend, I know that all will be alright.
On the day you passed away, I could not bring myself to accept the fact. I wanted to hit the young boy who drove without a license till he bled, so that he could feel the pain you felt. But as he kneeled on the floor in tears and begged for forgiveness, I could not bring myself to it. Dropping to my knees, I cried too. The memories of you filled my head, each one bringing another drop of tear to the pool beneath me. You were so young, and there was so much in life that awaited the both of us.
Why am I alone? I look back at the road, hoping to see you, as if you've merely tripped and was left behind, but got back on your feet and caught up with me again.
The world seemed black and lifeless. Little care had I left for anything, and only the thought of you kept me going. I visited every place in the world that reminded me of you, from where we first met at the carnival, to the city where we had our honeymoon. I cursed fate for taking you away from me, yet once again cried for it was also fate that brought us together. Was this some game that it played, bringing us with hopes to journey through life hand in hand, yet so easily breaking us apart with death?
I fall to the ground, the road's sharp slates cutting into my skin. There is nobody to pick me up again. For you are gone. And still, the road seems so long.
As I sit on our bed one day, looking through photographs of us, our little son puts his head on my lap, and says he misses you. I hug him tightly, and told him that I felt the same. Fate has denied him the love of his mother as he grew up, so I swore to myself never to let him or you down. But whenever I waited in the car to pick him up from school, or when I sat down during his wedding, I'd imagine that you were with me by my side, wearing the smile I'll never forget. Maybe you really were.
I get on my feet again, every inch raised from the ground powered by the memory and love I had with you. Still in my heart, you were with me. I dared the road once again.
Our son is by my side as I lie on the same bed we slept on. With him is his life's partner, and a little story which he and her have to write, just like we did. They are crying, but I can only help but smile. It's been so long, but I'm about to see you again.
Hey there... I believe we've met?
I finally close my eyes, with the image of our son and grandchild forever embedded into my soul. I can also see you standing beside them, smiling. Everything feels so light...
And here I am again, in an uncertain road, stretching endlessly. I can't see where it leads to, and feel afraid to retake this journey. Then I feel someone holding my hand, saying:
The school was crazy enough to have an assembly this morning. Over a hundred pure science students were pouring over Biology textbooks because the paper was due first. And you could guess how our reactions were.
Apparently there was an 'important' announcement. Yet again, another speech on raising school funds. They're thinking of revamping the entire school look, and are bringing in a 'so called' architect designer to plan a new theme for the school. Please be Turqoisue and White. *crosses fingers*. I can't stand the pink walls any longer.
Now, regarding the Ceriathon...wait. What's a ceriathon? I know what a Marathon is...but what's a ceriathon? Do we gather all the students in one place and see who can smile the longest? Or see who can be the nicest?
Whatever it is, we're supposed to raise funds for this 'Ceriathon'. Each person is to have a minimal of RM50 collected. And seriously, wtf? With exams and all, I'm sure they know we're busy. Oh wait, now I see their plan. "Ask the parents.". Geez.
I think the last time I went around collecting money for this sorta thing was back in Std 4. Ian Kok and I went around the neighborhood collecting cash for some jogathon we never took part in. We'd only ring the doorbells of houses that looked like it had well to do people(e.g. Auto gates, nice cars, fresh paint, etc). And...the sad part was that we split it 60-40. I got 40, of course. Oh, woe is me.
Our beloved Headmistress seems to be very edgy these days. There hasn't been once ever since the beginning of this year that whenever she spoke during assembly, she wouldnt scold us. I'd say menopause, but I think she went pass that phase along time ago. =( I miss the days when she's be sweet and caring, picking up rubbish when she sees them, or reciting english quotes(which I REALLY listen to) after every speech she makes. Now, she just PMSes all over us. Sigh.
And the majority of Form4 boys shouting, screaming, and clapping at every single thing like a bunch of handicaps doesn't do much good to the situation either. I was rather sleepy during today's assembly, but if I heard correctly, this was our Headmistress's last sentence:
Our school motto is..."TO HELL WITH THE MOTTO".
Geez.
Pic of the day:
Remember my new pencil box? Yeah, well, it's serving me REALLY nicely now, especially since you can never have enough space for stuff. Since the zippers were abit small, I attached some bling-bling to it.
The lower pouch(where I put stationery) has the Griever symbol.
This is my second blingbling. It's a metal carved with the word "Snake", following my chinese birth star. Sadly, half of it came out, so now all it means is worm. Bleh.
SOMEBODY HELP ME! I NEED A NEW BLING BLING! :'(
Edit: Click here if you don't know what a bling bling is.
Probably THE funniest imitation item, ever. Stereo. BWAHAHAHAAAHAHH!!!
Twist, lick, phunk!
Poh Nee skips MassCom and starts her own design label.
Angel the VERY FURRY is now Angel the not so furry. We sent the little bitch for a fur cut yesterday. She's so thinnnnnnn...
I told my mom she now looks like Sean Connery.
Many thanks to Vienna for writing me a birthday testimonial on Friendster. I'm surprised she even bothered since we didnt keep in touch for nearly a year =p Thanks anyway.
And last but definitely not least:
Many hugs, kisses, anals and etc to Fern, Nab and Zak! I love it! Strike Freedom~! And also, credits to Ooi Hong for helping me assemble it =p
LONDON: Don't get us wrong. We are not mercenary. Money is not the main reason why Malaysian professionals and students choose to remain in Britain.
That is UK Executive Council for Malaysian Students chairman Wan Mohd Firdaus Wan Mohd Fuaad's reply to Higher Education Minister Datuk Mustapa Mohamed's advice to Malaysian students that money was not everything and that they should return home after their studies. On Tuesday, Mustapa said Malaysian students must have a strong sense of nationalism and patriotism.
Firdaus said there was a host of other factors coming into play, including work culture, environment and exposure as well as job challenges and prospects.
“The Government should look at the bigger picture,” he said.
He said Malaysia could be competitive where money was concerned but the powers that be must make a greater effort to attract the students home.
“The Government cannot just expect these people to be nationalistic and patriotic and return to Malaysia when the time comes,” he said.
Firdaus said that from his discussions with Malaysian professionals such as investment bankers and doctors, money constituted only 30% of the pull factor. He said for instance, an investment banker earning about £50,000 (RM325,000) a year in London would probably get about RM240,000 back in Malaysia.
“Let’s face it. Malaysia is not their turf as they have already established their network and contacts in Europe and the United States.
“However, if they are made to feel wanted back home and to contribute their expertise to improve the country’s economy, they are prepared to sit down and look at the options available,” he added.
In this regard, Firdaus said government-linked companies including Khazanah Holdings and Danaharta and corporations like Tenaga Nasional could be more proactive. He said that so far, more than 100 professionals and mainly medical students have responded to the survey conducted by the council, which represents 58 Malaysian student societies or about 80% of the 12,000-strong student population in Britain.
“We hope to compile the final report and submit it to Deputy Science, Technology and Innovation Minister Datuk Kong Cho Ha by the end of next month,” he said.
London Umno Club chairman Dzariman Ibrahim agreed that work experience, exposure to the latest technology and access to the European market were among the pull factors.
While money was an issue, it was not the main reason for not returning home, he added. In Petaling Jaya, MCA international affairs bureau chairman Datuk Lee Hwa Beng said self-sponsored students should not be blamed for not returning after completing their studies overseas.
“Those whose studies were financed by their parents will be thinking about returning the money when they graduate.
“You cannot blame them. These people have spent a lot of money to get a degree and they need to earn it back,” he said. However, he said government-sponsored students were bound by their scholarships to return and work in the country.
“It is their responsibility to serve the country which financially supported them. And they should be prosecuted if they do not come back,” he said.
MCA Club Australia president Chan Wei Ming said verbal encouragement alone would not be enough to draw home those working overseas.
“Patriotism alone will not feed, support or motivate local doctors. You need better opportunities, respect and a better public healthcare system,” he said.
He added that many graduates remained overseas to gain more experience and resources in the hope that they would excel one day in their home country.
Chan said the Government had to do more to attract the brains home.
“A simple speech on nationalism and patriotism without any positive action is akin to baiting sharks with worms,” he said.
This was London's(Malaysian doctors) response to the Goverment's moral based advice and accusation that Medical students studying abroad should come home to work instead of staying abroad(London being the main point) just because factions overseas paid more money. Tahu tak apa. I've said before, this country is ruled by a Moral Texbook.
Though, it's not that I think patriotism is all that, but if all the good doctors were abroad, what does that leave us with?
It's very controversial because if a medical students studies HARD, it's obvious that, as a human being, they'd want to reap the full benefits of their hardwork, and really, for now Malaysia just can't offer that sort of pay(except private hospitals). This matter concerns both the welfare of the public health and medical students.
Communism isnt that far off, if you ask me. A police officer running a small business was caught and forced to close down because "Goverment servants must give full attention to the needs of the country."
They(The G-men) seem to keep forgetting that even though it is patriotic and selfless to serve the country full heartedly, it is also foolish to neglect the needs of their family, and dreams. Surely you can't expect much from the average policeman's salary.
I'm not saying that being a public servant is bad, but its just that for being selfless proffesionals, the goverment should make an effort to woe back their doctors, like benefits, instead of just saying "Oh you mesti PATRIOTIC, MESTI BALIK. Tak payah Makan la, patriotism boleh kenyang punya."
Bleh, this doesn't even concern me. Back to studying.
Fuck. You know what's fucked up? Do you know what's a cibai moment?
A cibai moment is when the shop you sent your glasses to for fixing 'because the stupid screw came off' did NOT screw it tightly enough, thus causing the glass to fall out of the frame one day and have major scratches. Then, you send it BACK to the original shop for major fixing, and then your mom keeps saying "collect tmr la, collect tmr la" until this evening when you go to check Optik Timur at Subang Parade, it's replaced by aLook and bein renovated until GOD knows when.
It seems to get worse and worse. And this, my friends, is what we call a cibai moment.
I hate feeling like a blind person whenever in class, not being able to see the board.
Some way to celebrate my last day as a sweet 16. Geez.
Happy birthday to Me.
EDIT: Here's the wishing category:
First to SMS: Jiale
First to sing me a song: Fern
First to MSN: Wai Jean
First to dedicate a blog entry(and only): Boon
First to put as an MSN nick: Pei Yi.
*continued*
First to wish me in person: Amelia Foo
First to hug me: Xiao Yu
First to mention a present: Su Fern.
My 'best friend' of 5 years didn't even wish me. Geez.
Yes, that was Brazillian for Jerk for Orgasm, Luzzio has a small penis. I kid you not.
The Interact IU was held last Saturday, and as usual, somehow or other your personal reporter Luzzio was there to busybody. Somehow.
We started practicing at about 9.30 with only a few hours to spare before the event, and we still only knew half the dance. Talk about cramming!
That girl in orange is Elyse. She wouldn't want a picture so I snapped one from behind, and barely escaped her clutches =p
Besides dancing, we pretty much helped Jia Sheen around doing odd-jobs. Most memorable were bringing down a Clavinoa(mini piano) down from the 2nd floor(my poor back), and carrying an entire tree branch from the playground to the school.
Oh btw, an update. Incase you've been sitting under a tree all week, you wouldn't know that these two are the HOTTEST new couple. The talk of the town, the Eva Longoria(wtv) of DH. Here, we have, the Chan's.
A beautifully decorated table.
A very strange looking...uh...backdrop. I'll just call it a black cloth.
The event started at 4.30, and by then I could already feel and see the smoke coming out of the ears of Nab, Jia Sheen, and the other committees. Basically, everyone was PMS-ing. Go figure.
By 5, the people were packing in. I was a little busy preparing for the dance, but here're some pics of familiar faces.
Xiao, Wai Jean and Andrew Chu. I wanted to take a picture with every Origin but was too shy to ask.
Lianne and Li Ching. 2/3 of an anime cult =) Nice to see you again after quite awhile, Lianne.
From my table:
Poon and Rent Kent looking like they're waiting for something. What leh?
Pravin with his..uh...headsets.
Panda. I jus realized that he looks like Andy Lim.
Sitting beside me is my dance partner Emily. She said she was too shy of the camera and didn't want a picture.
But really, who can resist the camera's temptation of camwhoring?
Me and one of the IU directors. I forgot her name... I think it's Jee Shin?
Some idiot.
The sketch for this IU was...well...silly. Those four people are trees. I only know 2 of them, the 2nd from the left is Bryan Lee(Amanda's little bro), and the one on the far right is Zakhren. He's the Datin of the Datok of this event.
This is Amar, the star of the sketch.
And his Bitch, Wen Jiet. Lol.
I wasnt really in the hall during the entire event. We practiced behind the school, and our legs were turning into jelly from nervousness with each passing minute.
Taking a picture with Su Fern outside the changing room.
WIth Li Ching near Block Flora. Isn't her hair just FABULOUS? Quoting Benjamin when I showed him the picture... "WHOA! HAWT!"
Lianne and I camwhoring. I love the way the black shirt contrasts with the white. =D
That's about it. By then, I couldn't take any pictures because was too busy preparing for the dance. Lighting was terrible, and I was partially blinded by the white flickery thingies when I went up on stage.
I loved the cheer and screams tho =) Emily was a great partner.
Here're some people I reckon would have wrote about the IU in more detail, and probably have pictures even:
And as a tribute to Nabilah(may she rest in peace(after a tiring project)), here's some pictures of your darling to squeel at. With a touch of Luzzioness.
Pic(s) of the day:
Oh yeah, Zak filmed the Capoeira dance/fight with his HP. I put it on YouTube, so here it is.
In 6 days at least. Come this Wednesday, I'm officially OLD ENOUGH to drive around killing old ladies. Ha!
Benjamin and VeiVern are just one day after me, so quoting Vei Vern, "I pity those people that know the three of us."
Hint hint, aye?
I noticed the LEO board today about a notice saying that the new LEO T-shirt was out and ready. I asked Sook Yee about it, and she showed me.
...
It was purple, and with a collar. Sigh. Typical. It's no wonder WHO thought up of this idea put design/impression over perfomance. Fashion. The fabric was like that of the Orange Sri KL uniform, which imho is hard to get around with especially when you're doing community work. Sigh. So many things in the Club have changed that I can't stand, example the New President. BUT, I've no longer a say in the club, do I?
Vern Sheng and Boon was asking me that day when our new president and Yi Lin were going up during assembly, "She's a LEO?"
I said 'yeah, and new president'
Jia Sheen(and some others) then told me that the NEW President apparently acted stupidly childish during the preparation of Unity Dinner. Think "Interact Sucks" quotes and club warfare sorta taunts. Aw gee, we have a new President that goes around screaming Interact sucks? Ha! Nice pick, people.
I talked to Xiao about it, and she said its these type of things that make her prefer not to climb the political ladder. Maybe she's right? Happier days were not being in charge, and just showing up for any LEO events which were organized by the seniors.
Sigh. Anyway, for those that know about my private blog, you can read a none held back post there. Passwords are the same. Just MSN me if you forgot.
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